


A Friday The 13th Fuck

by Choking_Noises



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Kinda, M/M, Smut, friday the 13th spooky shit, im refraining from tags so i don’t spoil anything, they may or may not be fucking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-13
Updated: 2018-04-13
Packaged: 2019-04-22 07:32:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14303850
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Choking_Noises/pseuds/Choking_Noises
Summary: Kageyama and Hinata have just moved into their new house, the domestic lovers they are. They decided to “break in” the house, when a series of peculiar noises come from down stairs.“Did you hear that?”“Yeah, but my dick didn’t.”





	A Friday The 13th Fuck

**Author's Note:**

> i saw this instagram post that said friends who show you new music are the best kind of friends so i’m going to be the best friend i can be : 
> 
> outright by wild party 
> 
> its a great song. also, today is the first day of a new era, a day where i write s3x. if it’s ass, then i’m truly sorry, i tried. also i wrote this entire thing in a matter of 2 afternoons for only the sole purpose of putting myself through rushed writing hell. enjoy.

Shouyou’s mind blurred as Kageyama slammed him against the chair in their bedroom, the back of his head colliding with the soft cushion. 

After one tension filled meal, a heated and uncoordinated run up the stairs, and the risk of letting their dirty dishes brew in the sink, Kageyama was hovering on top of him. Shouyou’s breath hitched as Kageyama’s hand pressed on his chest, making him even more trapped.  Kageyama’s legs settled around his, practically sitting in Shouyou’s lap. The warmth from their bodies transferred, and Shouyou’s heart was thumping like crazy. His eyes fluttered shut as Kageyama ran a big hand through the orange locks on his head. 

“Dinner was,” Kageyama stammered, pausing with an inhale, “Good.” Shouyou nodded, freeing his hands from his sides and wrapping them around Kageyama’s waist, palms on the small of his back as they sat. He tugged Kageyama closer, arching his back so their chests were pressed together. The contact shot a shiver up Shouyou’s spine as he vividly predicted the night ahead of him. 

“Yeah,” Shouyou breathed out, smiling slightly at the beauty that his boyfriend was. The way his eyes lidded, the needy shape of his lips as he waited for Shouyou to kiss him. The happy, aroused blush that spread the span of his cheeks. 

Kageyama’s face soon disappeared into the crook of Shouyou’s neck. Contact was finally made, and Shouyou let a sigh of relief slip from his mouth. Kageyama’s perfect lips were kissing his neck, his beautiful hands tugging at the collar of his white cotton shirt. His mouth traveled down around Shouyou’s exposed shoulder, mercilessly sucking deep purple bruises into his skin. Shouyou’s hands at Kageyama’s back started rising, rubbing circles softly over his thick sweater. And as Kageyama daringly licked up the side of his neck, Shouyou balled up the fabric. He pushed Kageyama away for a moment so he could tear it off his back, and enjoy the exposed skin of his wonderfully fit boyfriend. Kageyama had the same idea, bunching Shouyou’s shirt before sliding it over his head. 

Shirts were discarded, and Kageyama’s look was hungrier than ever. His tight ass was pressed against Shouyou’s dick through his thin shorts, hips rolling subtly. The teasing friction shot right to Shouyou’s lower, his lip bit in between teeth. 

“Kiss me already,” Kageyama smirked, his breath coming out heavy as his hands returned to Shouyou’s hair. Shouyou’s cock twitched as he finally kissed Kageyama’s lips forcefully, part Shouyou’s eagerness, part Kageyama’s guiding hands. Shouyou tilted his hips forward as Kageyama rolled into them, mouths colliding. Their tongues met, no intention of taking it slow. A sloppy kiss, a mess of Shouyou’s teeth clacking with Kageyama’s, and their pace ever changing. Kageyama, hand at the back of Shouyou’s neck, deepened this kiss even more. His mouth was hot, and his lips were soft. 

Kageyama’s hand traveled to Shouyou’s hip as they kissed, the light fingers on his bare chest tickling Shouyou. He giggled helplessly through the shallow parts of their kiss, until Kageyama’s hand shifted further down. Shouyou went silent as Kageyama’s hand palmed his half hard dick through his shorts. He pulled away, gasping and smiling at Shouyou. 

“Can I?” Kageyama asked, and Shouyou wore a huge grin.

“You better,” Shouyou assured, moving closer to Kageyama so he could lick his bottom lip, taking it into his mouth. Kageyama didn’t hesitate, hand stroking his length through fabric. Shouyou moaned into his mouth. 

Suddenly, Kageyama slid his legs off the chair, lips still connected to Shouyou’s. He pulled him from the chair too, wrapping his legs around Kageyama. They stumbled the short distance to the bed, Kageyama supporting Shouyou by a firm hand on his ass. Shouyou’s dick was pressed up Kageyama’s bare chest. He was dying to get these pants off. 

Kageyama, separating their lips for one short second, threw Shouyou onto the bed, his head bouncing. He was feeling blissfully light headed.  

Kageyama spread Shouyou’s legs out and let them dangle off the bed as he went between them, engaging in an even rougher kiss than before. His hands grabbed at Shouyou’s hips, tilting them forward so they touched his own. His fingers slipped underneath Shouyou’s boxers, sliding them and his shorts off as a whole. Once they were gone, Kageyama didn’t hesitate to grab Shouyou’s bare dick, swiping his fingers over the precome at his tip. 

Shouyou sighed in relief, tilting his head, arching his back. Kageyama had pulled away from the kiss, licking his own lips in delight. He removed his hand from Shouyou’s dick, grabbing roughly at his hips. Kageyama stood up more, shoving Shouyou further onto the bed. 

“Shouyou,” Kageyama said. Shouyou’s heart raced. “I’m gonna fuck you so hard.” He smirked, lifting Shouyou’s leg and rubbing to his calf. Shouyou felt giddy, only managing to raise his arms over his head, stretching all the muscles on his chest.  _ You better. _ He smiled expectantly, waiting for Kageyama to do something.

Kageyama left for a second, presumably getting the lube and condom. Shouyou pressed himself into the bed, closing his eyes. Could Kageyama be any slower? Shouyou lifted himself on his elbows, gazing around the room to spot him. He was in front of Shouyou, tossing the items onto the bed as he fumbled with his zipper. Shouyou grinned, sitting up just enough to reach his waist. He softly touched Kageyama’s hands, moving them away. He slid Kageyama’s pants off himself, stroking his dick through his thin boxers. When he looked at Kageyama, his face was euphoric. But the faster he stroked, the more annoyed he got. 

“Who told you you could sit up?” Kageyama growled, a little too late. He pushed Shouyou back into the bed, removing his boxers on his own to reveal his hard, flushed cock. Shouyou gulped, the idea of it inside him clouding his brain.

That’s when Shouyou heard the first noise. A thud from down stairs. It was quiet, but ominus. Though, not ominus enough to ruin his boner. Shouyou tried his hardest to ignore it, which was easy with this huge distraction looming over him. It was probably just his imagination. 

Kageyama got on the bed himself, pushing Shouyou’s legs up and open, his feet flat on the bed but his knees in the air. Tension was building again, and Shouyou just wanted to be touched. 

Kageyama hovered over Shouyou’s face again, leaning in to place more hard kisses on his neck. Shouyou moaned shamelessly when Kageyama reached his nipple, sucking relentlessly. He threw his head back with more force, waiting for Kageyama to give his dick more attention. It was throbbing underneath the pressure of Kageyama’s chest, and Shouyou’s mind was going blank with thirst. 

Kageyama answered, grinding down sloppily as he dribbled some lube onto his hands, some of it dripping to Shouyou’s chest on accident. A moan escaped his mouth as the friction grew, hot and rewarding. But he wanted more, of course. 

Another sound rang out from down stairs, and Shouyou started to worry. What could be making so much noise? This time it was louder, and obviously not his imagination. He looked up at Kageyama, who seemed to be more horny than concerned. 

Shouyou was about to say something, when Kageyama’s fingers pressed on his entrance. He moaned, not realizing how much he really wanted that. Arousal burned in his stomach, a unique shiver crawling through his body. It felt so good that he almost forgot about the sound downstairs, before it happened again. 

This time it was loud, so loud that even Kageyama jerked his head. It sounded like an intruder, and Shouyou was putting all his bets on a monster.

“Kageyama?” Shouyou whined, “Did you hear that?” Kageyama, being the man he is, frowned. 

“Yeah,” He answered, still rubbing Shouyou. “But my dick didn’t,” He laughed, a smirk on his face as he slid a finger into Shouyou. He winced, back arching. Warmth festered throughout his entire body, but his mind couldn’t forget about the sound. He’s sure everything would be so much hotter if he wasn’t spooked and terrified for his life. 

Though Shouyou really didn’t want to pause this, he, being a responsible adult, knew they had to do something. 

“I—,” Shouyou’s statement broke as he moaned into his own bit lip. This was an awful situation. “I think we need to investigate.” 

Once Kageyama registered what that meant through his thick skull, he leaned more to Shouyou’s face. He was hoping Kageyama wouldn’t try and kiss him, but at the same time he was? It’s the testosterone. 

“But Shouyou,” Kageyama moaned, using his first name just to spite him. “I’m soooo hard.” Somehow, this didn’t affect Shouyou. Kageyama added another finger, only sending Shouyou into another cycle of horny and rational thoughts, deciphering one from another. His lower was extremely needy, but his common sense was telling him that not dying was a lot better than a good fuck. Or was it? 

“But Tobio,” Shouyou protested breathlessly, after he had adjusted to the two fingers inside him. “I’m soooo terrified.” 

Kageyama sighed, pulling back from Shouyou. His eyes were still lidded, but annoyed. “Dumbass,” He frowned, twisting and thrusting his fingers subtly. Shouyou closed his eyes, mind over matter. He could do this. “It’s probably nothing,” Kageyama assured, but Shouyou could tell he was afraid. Annoyed, afraid, and horny. What a combination. 

“You’re so cute,” Shouyou grinned. He slowly slid away from Kageyama, mentally cursing at the emptiness in his core. “And you’d be even cuter if you’d come see what paranormal shit is raging hell in our house.” Kageyama just grunted, wiping his fingers off on Shouyou’s thigh, just to be a dick. 

Just as Shouyou and Kageyama had settled down, they were faced with another noise. The loudest one yet, maybe the dropping of metal. Was it a gun? A knife? Are they walking to their deaths? Shouyou glanced up at Kageyama, terrified. 

Kageyama, who seemed to think he had total control of the situation, turned away from him and uncoordinatedly stepped into his boxers. Shouyou followed suit, heart beating incessantly. This was too scary for Kageyama to act so stupid. He was going to pull Shouyou down stairs, yell something like,  _ “Fuck off, you,”  _ to the mysterious noises, and drag him back up so he could resume pounding him into the mattress. 

They both hopped from the bed, and made their way downstairs. 

Once Shouyou reached the bottom, he saw nothing. It was their living room/foyer area, and everything seemed to be in place. Shouyou wrapped his arms around his chest, feeling insecure. He didn’t want Kageyama to yell at him for being wrong. 

He glanced up, and Kageyama was about to say something, before a cold gust of wind interrupted him. Shouyou turned around to be confronted with a half open front door. He can’t actually describe how it felt, but his heart dropped through his hastily prepared ass. 

“Kageyama…” Shouyou gasped, his chest clenching. There was someone in their house. Someone had to be fucking with them, right? Or maybe that someone was… a ghost. “We’re gonna die.” He deadpanned. 

Kageyama just glared at him. Shouyou saw him cockily flex his biceps, slamming the front door shut. He deadbolted the lock, and furrowed his brows. “If you’re in my house, fuck off!” He screamed. Shouyou had predicted it. “We just payed the down payment! I know martial arts.” 

He didn’t. 

“Let’s go to the kitchen,” Shouyou proposed, probably not the best idea. “My samurai sword is in there.” He tugged on Kageyama’s sleeve, He didn’t budge. 

“What if it’s in there?” He whispered. 

“You’re gonna beat their asses’ right?” Shouyou asked, seriously. 

“I can’t die,” Kageyama frowned. “When I’m horny.” A roar of demonic laughs echoed from somewhere ahead of them. Oh, fuck. Fuck. Shouyou backed up, grabbing onto Kageyama. He hugged onto him for dear life, absorbing his flinch. 

They stood there like that for a few minutes, both completely terrified. What were they gonna do? They were really fucked, so impossibly fucked. Ironically, considering they were cocked blocked by monsters. 

“You know,” Shouyou started, trying to give Kageyama confidence. “Ancient Roman warriors fought naked in battles, to intimidate their opponents.” Kageyama just kicked his foot, Shouyou grabbing onto him tighter. “Like dick out and everything.” 

“Are you telling me to strip and confront our intruder, beating the sense into them with the image of my perfect body?” Kageyama asked being sarcastic at the wrong time. Shouyou stepped forward, pushing Kageyama deeper into their living room. 

“I was just trying to make you feel better about your boner,” Shouyou said, feeling self conscious about his actions. But, what’s new? 

“That,” Kageyama sighed, “Is long gone.” Oh.  _ Oh, _ that makes sense. 

“Well,” Shouyou whispered, effectively dragging Kageyama farther. “Then you won’t have a problem defending me.” 

Kageyama huffed. “We should just go and call the cops. C’mon, we’re being stupid. Typical Hinata.” 

“You can’t call the cops on a ghost, dumbass.” 

“Yeah, but, you can call the police on,” Kageyama raised his whisper. “ _ Fucking intruders _ .” 

Shouyou sighed at a realization. “But we don’t have wifi yet, how are we gonna call them?” 

“Fuck, you’re right,” Kageyama balled his fist in the air. 

_ Little did Kageyama and Hinata know, that they could call 911 perfectly fine on their cell service, no wifi needed. They’re fucking idiots..  _

Shouyou cursed himself for not setting up their wifi sooner. He’s an idiot. Now they’re dying. Shouyou’s going to die, and he missed out on one, last, good fuck. 

They both tip toed deeper into the living room, nearing the open entrance of their kitchen. Shouyou couldn’t look, really. He was going to die of a heart attack. 

Kageyama went ahead, protecting his helpless bottom (Shouyou). Shouyou trusted Kageyama to not fuck this up. He shouldn’t, but it’s all he has at this point. 

“You,” Kageyama yelled before entering. He looked back at Shouyou, who just shrugged his shoulders. “Bastards.” More footsteps were heard, Shouyou’s asshole quivered, and Kageyama continued. “F—fuck you.” Yes Kageyama, that stuttering of yours, sounds extremely confident. 

Kageyama hesitantly looked into the kitchen. Shouyou heard him sigh, relieved. “No one in here.” 

Shouyou sighed too. 

“This is, freaky,” Shouyou cringed. This was awful. They both treaded into the kitchen, Shouyou close behind Kageyama. The tile was cold against his bare feet, only adding to the ominous feel. Shouyou noticed the dirty dishes in their sink, sending flash backs to the moments before. How do things change so fast? He was supposed to be getting fucked “so hard” (Kageyama’s words) right now. 

“Yeah,” Kageyama replied. “Don’t worry about it.” 

Another sound rang out. It was back behind them, which attacked Shouyou with even more fear than he’d had previously. The monster had the upper hand, it was gaining on them. 

Kageyama instinctively grabbed Shouyou’s arm dragging him as he ran through the hallway, into their half bath. Once inside, Kageyama slammed the door shut, a bad decision, giving away their location. He locked it, back pressed to prevent it from opening. 

Shouyou looked at him, seeing Kageyama actually scared for the first time. His chest was rising without a constant pace, his lips looked blue, and his eyes were wide, scared. His pupils were so dilated Shouyou could barely see them, and it finally  _ really _ settled in, what was going on. There was something in their house, and Kageyama just trapped them in their bathroom. 

They could very possibly die. 

“Shouyou,” Kageyama called his first name. Shouyou turned to him, not really knowing what to think. His arm was still burning from Kageyama’s grip, and the bruises on his hips forming. He was going die with an Orion Belt of hickeys on his body. “I love you.” He smiled, and it broke Shouyou’s heart. Fuck, what the fuck was this? 

“I know,” Shouyou said, turning to look at himself in the mirror. Plenty of hickeys littered his neck and chest, red marks too. His hair was tousled, and he smiled. “I love you too.” 

“Hey, look,” Kageyama ruined the moment, pointing to the wall across from him. 

And there it was. 

Their knight in shining armour. 

“Fuck,” Shouyou celebrated, “Fuck, fuck, fuck! Look at that, Kageyama, fuck. You’re genius.” 

“Less celebrating, more escaping.”

A window. A small one, a high one, but a chance. A chance that these idiots weren’t going to die. 

Feet started stomping down the hall. Shouyou’s heart stopped, but he couldn’t stall his movements. He needed to get that window open. It sounded like multiple people, they couldn’t take that. 

Shouyou climbed his way on top of the toilet, tip toeing to reach the window. Kageyama was holding fort, body weight against the locked door. This was fucking, wild. 

Shouyou heard the handle on the door start rattling. He had got the latch on the window undone, and was pushing it up. They could do this, they really could. Once Shouyou forced the window open with shaky hands, he felt Kageyama’s strong hands at his thighs, pushing him up through the window. Since Kageyama was away from the door, Shouyou was praying it wouldn’t open.

But, as luck would have it, it did. 

Shouyou knew he shouldn’t look, because it would kill him. Something awful was waiting for him, and Kageyama wasn’t helping him through the window anymore. That was odd, considering they were  _ literally about to die. _

Shouyou looked down to see Kageyama’s eyes glued to the door frame. That couldn’t be good. 

Hesitantly, Shouyou looked too. 

Two men, about six foot. Muscular, dominating. Terrifying. 

 

Two men, about six foot. Muscular, annoying. Intoxicated. 

Bokuto and Kuroo. 

When Shouyou looked up at them, they bursted out into boisterous laughter, Bokuto snapping a picture with his phone. 

“Bro,” He laughed. “Akaashi is gonna love this.” Kuroo laughed in response. Shouyou, blown out of his fucking mind, felt Kageyama lower him onto the ground. He could tell Kageyama was going to beat some ass. 

“PRAnKed!” They both yelled in unison, pointing fingers at half dressed Shouyou and Kageyama. Bokuto slapped his knee on the way down, howling. 

“Kageyama,” Shouyou said, seeing the blatant anger on his face. “I was right, they are monsters.”   


**Author's Note:**

> this is some sketch i made for this if u wanna 
> 
> https://slptee.tumblr.com/post/172890111627/context-is-absent-because-you-can-find-out-what


End file.
